Christmas 2017

Merry Christmas from Texas!!!                         December 2017                    This year a few big events happened in Houston, Texas. Hurricane Harvey left Houston with flooding and damage. Many people flooded and lost everything. We feel fortunate that our neighborhood did not flood. Trisha’s brother, sister and their families did not flood. Harvey brought a lot of heartache to a lot of people but a lot of good. Hearts were opened and turned to others. People from other states brought boats to help rescue people. After the waters receded, the Latter Day Saints had crews (angels in yellow shirts) wearing Helping Hands shirts and mucking homes. Matt’s dad, brother(Michael) and nephew(Nathan) came down for a BYU game and worked with us to muck a home before the game and then wore helping hands vests to church the next day. After a brief meeting, they mucked more homes. Brayden and Brielle also participated in mucking homes. Bryce & Brenlee joined us for passing out drinks and snacks to working crews. People are still rebuilding their homes and their lives but we are Houston Strong!  

  We convinced the kids to do a family Halloween costume theme. We went Kung Fu Panda style. We had a lot of fun and Bryce loved his panda belly that doubled as a candy bag. 

       We cheered the Astros on to a World Series and celebreated their win. Brayden, especially ejoyed watching the games with his dad. The win meant a lot to Houston after the flooding. Go Astros!!!

   Brielle got her wish about snow in Houston. It snowed the day she was born and she hoped for more this year.(We didn't make it to Utah for Thanksgiving because grandparetns were traveling. We did find some snow in a canyon this Summer when we were in Utah and we plaed then.) We were delighted to see snow made its way to Texas and the kids were excited to play. We built a couple of snowmen, played snowball(like baseball) and had snowball fights. Bryce missed his bus and Matt went in late to work, but it was a fun morning and completely worth it. The homeschooled kids had a snow day.
                       

                     Our family has been involved in fundraising. Bryce fell in love with his cousin’s dog and has asked for a “red dog.” We found a breeder and started fundraising to purchase him a sensory trained golden doodle. In October, we did a Halloween Carnival, made monster pops, gave rides to a person that temporarily needed rides and did some face painting. Over Thanksgiving we did some pet sitting and also for the Christmas break. In December, we wrapped Christmas books for different families (open one a day till Christmas). We made reindeer brownies and noses. We have been blessed as people have opened their hearts to participating and helping us make steps toward our goal. It has been a blessing to include all the kids to work together.   

      Matthew continues to play basketball once or twice a week. He enjoys it and plays religiously. He has a new calling in Elder’s Quorum at the deaf branch. He’s excited to be more involved with the adults (although Bryce misses him as his teacher in primary) and to learn more ASL. He has a few projects in progress. This year he built a firepit and the whole family enjoys it. He is putting pavers in the flower beds to help with weed control. He found some dead space in the attic and he's making storage shevels. He built a picture display board and pieced together a wooden flag for Trisha to make a Texas flag board. Trisha LOVES the finished product.He put a lot of time into building the haunted house and taking it down. He put his projects on the backburner to do it. What a great dad! Bryce is his building buddy and enjoyed every minute of it. 
       

 

                   
       Trisha enjoys watching “Turning Point” on BYUtv when she’s on the treadmill. She enjoys homeschooling (most days) and continues to learn something new every year. She has a new church calling as the Relief society secretary. We celebrated our 12^th anniversary this December and feel blessed to have spent a dozen years together.                                                                                                         Brayden (11), our fifth grader and family prankster, was thrilled to build another haunted house this year. Of course it needed to be bigger and he’s already making plans for a two story haunted house next year. He enjoys his monthly Lego/Pokémon club since he rekindled his like for Pokémon. He enjoys chess and learned how to “castle” for homeschool coop last year. In Cub Scouts he took 2nd place in the Pinewood Derby and 1st place in the Rain Gutter Regatta. He is now in Boy Scouts and he will have his Arrow of Light ceremony in January. Brayden has enjoyed making extra money mowing a lawn and pet sitting. He participated in a basketball camp this Summer and in golf this Fall. He continues to play piano. Brayden gave his first talk in sacrament for the deaf branch primary program. He stayed with a homeschool family when his parents were out of town with Bryce and asked if we could implement kid cooking days. He didn’t have to twist Trisha’s arm (of course). He wants to be an engineer and attend BYU. His parents couldn’t be more pleased. He loves the ASL missionaries and always wants to sit with them at church and have them over for dinner.

     Brielle(9), our third grader, has enjoyed homeschooling this year. She participated in a Cinderella play and really enjoys theatre. She loves to dress up and has quite an imagination. She loves her art class and created a number of different pieces for us to display. She enjoys her book club and looks forward to meeting every month. She’s still very much a bookworm and just like the Very Hungry Caterpillar, she devours books. Brielle has been a pet sitter and enjoys any opportunities; after all, she wants to be a veterinarian. She is interested in being a mother’s helper as well. We are pleased with her progress as she continues to be brave and work through shy tendencies.

    Bryce (6), our first grader, misses his teacher from last year and has struggled with so many changes at a new school. The deaf program moved to a new school and all of his specialists are new. His teacher from the previous two years gifted us with a blessing of interpreting at the home ward once a month. He looks forward to seeing her each month. She came over for a special surprise before church and he was ecstatic. He toured her around the house, gave her a present and card and then opened them for her (even though he helped Trisha wrap them). Bryce loved having his parents all to himself during Dad’s work trip to the Bahamas. He was excited to fly and the pilot invited him sit in his chair and see the cockpit. He got his own set of wings from the nice attendants. He loved the water and would sign “swim” before he even opened his eyes(every morning at the hotel). He took a pretty hard hit to his eye (just before our trip) and got a shiner. We were thankful his eye did not sustain any damage. He has low vision and we were concerned any damage would further reduce his vision. He maintains his Paw Patrol obsession and he’s most fond of the fireman dog, Marshall. Recently, Bryce has learned to pump his legs and swing on his own. He’s excited when it’s his turn to say family prayer and he is the biggest Christmas fan we know. Patience for Christmas and a “red dog” have been hard for him but he looks forward to both. The puppies were born in the middle of December and will be ready to go to their homes February 5th. It’s too perfect for Bryce’s February birthday! 

      Brenlee(3) our playgroup kiddo, has a weekly playgroup that she absolutely loves. She enjoys friends and asks (just about every day) if she has playgroup. She LOVES to hear stories and often Brielle reads to her, even in the car.  She loves coloring and has her own desk and drawer with coloring books and coloring pages. She loves all things girly. I think she changes clothes more than everyone combined. She loves to dress up and play with Brielle. She also makes up songs and will ask, “do you want to hear my song?” They’re pretty hilarious and random. There’s a reason her name sign means “funny.”  The other day I told her to hold her horses and she said, “I’ve got all of them!” hahaha. She keeps us laughing and smiling. She finished up nursery this year and looks forward to becoming a Sunbeam (at church) in January. She also enjoys going to a local activity called “Music Makers” on Fridays.   

    We hope our letter will find you well. We hope you’ll enjoy a wonderful Christmas and a happy New Year. May you be blessed in your lives and recognize the goodness of a loving Heavenly Father. His greatest gift was given with the gift of His son, Jesus Christ. We celebrate the Savior of the world at Christmas and throughout the year. We continue to learn and study His life and endeavor to strive to be like Him.  

                                                                    Love,

Matthew, Patricia, Brayden, Brielle, Bryce, & Brenlee

(The Texas Nelsons)

The Case for Homeschool

This is our second year to homeschool. We started more as a necessity than anything. Brayden was declining and didn't have adquate energy. I'm pretty sure it would have never happened otherwise. I had considered it before but I could tell Matt did not approve of home schooling so we dropped the topic. He had seen examples of how it can go wrong. I, on the other hand, saw examples of how it went right. I met a brother and sister pair at BYU that were 16 and 17. He would pretty much finish school before his mission.  I was interested and asked her questions because it fascinated me.

I kept have reoccuring dreams every school year. I was back at school teaching and my kids were with me. In the dream, it freaked me out because that's not professional and you just can't do that. Once I started home schooling and those dreams went away, I told Matt I wonder if those dreams had meaning. I truly feel they did and I truly think home school is for our family. (Not for Bryce at this point but maybe some day.)

Our first year was rough. I remember doing my best to keep it together. Inside I was dying b/c I had two children that were dying. I had to push it aside and focus on Brayden. We started by building our cinder block gardens. They took time and it was a challenge but we love them. Now is fascinated with gardening and it's more "food science" as he experiments with plants that want more sun or less sun, more water or less water. He's diligent to get out to the garden and water and weed. (I read that gardening is good for the immune system and I think that's wonderful. It also gives him responsibility.) Recently he has started making smoothies. He writes a recipe and then experiments with them. They're pretty good. He's quite the entreprenuer as well. He's always looking for ways to make money. He's talked about selling his tomatos from the garden. He's also talked about charging me for piano lessons. hahaha (He usually chooses "fun reads" at the library but recently he chose a book about seeds, engineering and how to train dogs.I love that he's taking the initiative to learn more about his areas of interest.)

We got a diagnosis and started treatment. We did fall behind as we had doctor appointments and we couldn't go full speed because of the energy factor. Brielle chose to homeschool that year after nine weeks of school. She did not complete first grade but wanted to return to school for second.Honestly, I was a little worried because we didn't complete the first grade curriculum. A couple of days ago, she had her awards ceremony and I felt content when she received her A honor roll award. (Ironically, a little girl that's been a bit of a bully, had teased Brielle for getting the A/B honor roll b/c of her award tags on her backpack. I noticed that the little girl got the A/B honor roll at this awards ceremony.) I'm not advocating falling behind but I think kids can learn a lot in a short amount of time. School days are long and I'm not sure they help accomplish this goal.

Brayden recently had an ARD because I requested an evaluation with the intent for him to attend the deaf program. I thought it would be great for him to be able to go with Bryce and to meet other deaf children. I read through twenty-two pages of the evaluation. A couple of things stood out to me and the first thing was he told the tester he plans to attend Brigham Young University. :) The second thing that stood out to me is after each day of testing (two days), he was allowed to pick a treasure out of the treasure chest. On the second day, he told the tester he wanted to pick a fan for his Mom for Mother's Day. (I spoke with a teenager at Brielle's awards ceremony that said she and her Mom agreed they couldn't homeschool because they wouldn't like each other. I told her I feel it's the opposite. If anything, it will make you closer. I truly feel Brayden is closer to me than most kids his age are close to their Moms. She said she has an attitude. I think all kids do and there's head butting whether you homeschool or not.)

The ARD committee had already decided that he would not qualify for the deaf ed program. He simply hears too well and he's too smart. Typically a child is two or three years behind to qualify. While I understand their perspective, I don't understand how they would account for his neuropathy. You can turn a mic up as loud as you want but if there's a "short" in the connection, the message is lost or jumbled. Their suggestion is "visuals". I just don't feel they will meet his needs adequately. I also think kids are mean and he doesn't need to be subjected to that. He already feels different as it is. We are considering looking into Lonestar and their ASL classes. Maybe we'll spend more time with Sister Gurr and sign with her. I did mouth words and then signed. They all looked at me like "huh"? The Cy-Fair rep understood my sign. I find it ridiculous that one of the compensating strategies is lip reading and they expect Brayden to use it as well. They were offering an Itenerant teacher to come for 45 mins every nine weeks (as a min). While I appreciated their offer, I signed a statement of disagreement and opted to continue to homeschool. They said should we change our mind, the accomodations would be ready for implementation.

It was frustrating but we knew if he didn't get into the program, we would homeschool. His testing also showed that he's average and above average. He's a smart kid and although we fell behind (he told the tester that he just started fourth grade a few months ago), he's on or above level. It also shows his improvement with his cochlear implant. He will need continued corrections (he says d-bout for doubt and others  when he mispronounces words, but overall, he's doing well.
**As a side, I emailed this article to the auditory specialist in our district and she called and talked to me. She said we can certainly call another ARD but that doesn't mean that he will be allowed into the program.

Something’s Missing In Early Intervention For Deaf Children

05/31/2017 09:41 pm ET | Updated 1 day ago

·          During a Language Readiness for Deaf and Hard of Hearing Children forum hosted by the Pennsylvania Society for Advancement of the Deaf, it was agreed that early, unrestricted access to language is critical for cognitive and linguistic development.

The attendees at the PSAD forum represented varying organizations with varying approaches on how to serve deaf and hard of hearing children.

American Sign Language, Listening and Spoken Language, hearing aids, cochlear implants, itinerant teachers, interpreters, Communication Access Real-time Translation (CART), mainstreaming, deaf schools, and bilingual education.

Given that any combination of modalities can coexist, PSAD chose not to focus on the argument of whether one is better than the other.

Of more concern is the fact that there are still too many deaf and hard of hearing kids who fall through the cracks with significant language delays. PSAD’s goal, then, is to objectively identify why this happens and address the issue accordingly.

Although PSAD is in the beginning stages of a statewide collaboration for more effective strategies, a quick look over the deaf education landscape already reveals a pressing need.

There aren’t enough deaf people involved in the process.

During the critical language acquisition years of 0-5, there need to be deaf professionals, deaf mentors, and deaf role models involved from the outset. Strangely, they are often excluded when a newborn baby is first identified as deaf.

This needs to change. Common sense dictates that if you want to understand what it’s like to be deaf, ask a deaf person.

An audiologist can tell you the degree of a deaf person’s hearing loss. A doctor or surgeon can give you an in-depth presentation on the anatomy of the ear and how it functions.

But only a deaf person can accurately explain what it means, and what it feels like, to be deaf. This is valuable information that cannot be ignored. Yet it often is.

If you just found out that your child is deaf and if none of the consultants who advise you what to do about it are deaf themselves, there’s a gaping hole in the information you are being provided. It’s best to get the whole story if you want to address the whole child.

Again, it is no longer about whether “this” is better than “that.” It’s about 100 percent accessibility and filling in whatever gaps, as early as possible, that may exist in a child’s journey towards language acquisition.

Parents have a right to know everything from the very beginning. No more waiting until their deaf child has a chance encounter with another deaf person at age 15, finding out they have a lot in common, and then wondering: Why didn’t anyone tell us about this before?

Emerging research has continued to prove that there is no harm (and in fact, there are many benefits) in exposing deaf and hard of hearing children to all of the opportunities that are available for them.

Today, many deaf adults look back on their school days and wish they had those opportunities.

As one of those deaf adults, I remember all too well how I struggled in the mainstream, yet my teachers repeatedly said “He’s doing fine.”

How could they speak like that on my behalf? Without checking with me first? They meant well, but they’re not deaf.

I’m not saying they were wrong. I’m saying they simply didn’t understand. There was no way for them to understand. There’s no way they can understand the world as seen from my point of view. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

As the father of a deaf child who was initially mainstreamed, it hit me hard when I saw his teachers repeating the very same “He’s doing fine.” Unbeknownst to them, this kid who was doing fine would come home and tell me he couldn’t stand being the only deaf kid in his school.

Our stories are just the tip of the iceberg. But if you include us, we can provide valuable information for the next generation of deaf and hard of hearing children.

Liz Hill, a PSAD board member who moderated the language readiness forum, hit the nail on the head when she shared an article titled Principles and Guidelines for Early Intervention After Confirming That a Child is Deaf or Hard of Hearing. It drives home the point of including qualified deaf professionals in Early Intervention. I agree wholeheartedly.

It’s kind of ironic how inclusion used to be a bad word in the deaf community (its misuse led to deaf children being isolated in the mainstream, away from deaf peers and role models). It’s now exactly what we’re calling for in Early Intervention.

The inclusion of deaf professionals in an area where they have so much to offer.

Now, the kids are doing well despite falling behind and with basic teaching. I mean basic as in, we plan to start Spanish as another language (continue ASL) and start beginning Latin. We can pick and choose areas of interest and this really benefits Brielle because she hates PE. Some would say, doesn't this cost more. It does cost more to purchase curriculum but as far as extra curriculars, no. Other people have their kids in so many other activities AFTER all day school. Mine can participate in piano, dance and sports as a part of it. It helps to keep us from overscheduling. I keep seeing videos where kids don't know how to do the basics. My kids are getting "real world" experiences now. I love BYU's sign that says, "The World is Our Campus."

I also enjoy discussions with the kids. The other morning at breakfast Brielle asked me why we close our prayers "in the name of Jesus Christ" if the prayer is to Heavenly Father. I told her that's a great question. Christ is the mediator, our Savior, and the only way for us to return back to Heavenly Father. While we pray to our Heavenly Father, it is through Christ, that we are redeemed and we can overcome physical and spiritual death. Heavenly Father designed it that way and it shows respect to both of them.

Later I read scriptures with Brayden and we discussed repentence. He said he isn't really sure about the process. I told him that we have to recognize our wrong and (correct) apologize for it. Maybe if he hits his brother, he would need to apologize to him but also to Heavenly Father. We talked about how we've learned about when we serve others, we serve God. Likewise, when we hurt others.... (he filled in)....we hurt God.Exactly!

Homeschool can be hard at times. It's extra hard that Bryce's program doesn't allow school aged children but it can be so wonderful. They don't get as tired either. I'm listening to Thomas Jefferson Education and they talk about the glaze. Glaze is great on donuts but not on kids. It's awful when they come home and their eyes are glazed over. Learning should be fun! It can be hard if you have doctor appointments or places that are hard to go with kids. I'm sure it will get easier as Brayden turns 12 and can help with younger kids. For now, we do the best we can.

There are times I see other Moms with their kids at school and I feel like maybe we're missing something. Maybe my kids are missing awards that they could have earned if they were in school. I came across an article about "Valedictorians" and it gave me more peace. Not to undermine them b/c that's an amazing accomplishment. There are a few, including Matt, on his side of the family. The article talked about how after school, they didn't necessarily stand out from the rest. I remember the boy in my grade that had that honor and he was a member. He got the Hinckley scholarship which is also an honor. He chose a career path with statistics. I remember when the economy tanked and he was unemployed. Those things happen but basically, he was pretty "common" with his job and success.

 Maybe I'm deprived of time to clean the house or run errands or go have more "me" time. Then I look at the long days and think how much time I would be robbed of not having them. Brayden is already ten, soon to be eleven in September. I enjoy teaching and that's my degree. What better way to use those skills than on my own children! Do you need a degree to homeschool? No! I've met a number of parents that homeschool their special needs children b/c the schools were failing them. Not failing them as in grades but as in not providing adequate services. Sometimes you can't homeschool some kids. Bryce is that child for me. I hope it changes down the road but I haven't mastered the language and he hasn't mastered his energy. He's thriving in his environment AND he wants to go to school. He got out a week before the other kids and he's already asking about school. It's the right thing for him. Every family has to feel good about their decisions and it can be different for each child. Brielle really wanted to go back to school this last year. I felt a little sad about it but gave her the go ahead. The thing I missed the most was devotionals. I had the idea (inspired) to send friend magazine handouts with her for devotionals in her lunch box. The Lord truly blesses us to know how to reach our children whether we homeschool or not. I will never judge or condemn someone that doesn't homeschool. I'm a firm believer that every parent does the best they can.

My Talk on Scriptures

I gave a talk today. I like giving talks to prepare and learn but I don't like giving them because public speaking isn't my thing. I actually gave the talk in sign language. I have come a long ways but, of course, I still have a long ways to go.

Here's my talk: 

We know the story of about Joseph Smith and the scripture James 1:5 “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God.” Joseph Smith read the scripture and it stood out to him. He thought about it and pondered it. He was confused about “which church to join” and decided to apply it and “ask”. The first vision happened. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph Smith. He was told to join none of the churches.

Have you ever thought about how Joseph was raised? About his home life and environment? His family was familiar with the scriptures and read them. They believed in God and some of them had joined a church. After angel Moroni visited with Joseph, he talked to his dad about his visions. His dad believed him and said it was of God.

What kind of environment do we have in our homes? Do we read the scriptures? Do we study them? Are we reading together as families and having personal scripture study?

When my boys lost their hearing, we had to consider a different way of reading scriptures. We don’t “read” them as a family, we watch them. We watch the ASL scripture stories. The kids are sometimes distracted but we do it anyway. Why? 

It’s important to read the scriptures. Elder Hales said, ““When we want to speak to God, we pray. And when we want him to speak to us, we search the scriptures.” According to Elder Hales, scriptures are just as important as prayer!

A few months ago, I had an experience like this with the scriptures. I was frustrated with a situation and thought about it and thought about it. One day, while reading with my son, the story hit me in a very personal way. People will do things we don’t like or agree with but we need to recognize they don’t know all the details in our lives. It really stood out to me and I got that message clearly. I knew Heavenly Father knew I was bothered about the situation but this scripture gave me peace and “taught” me how to respond to my frustrations.

There are both  good examples and bad examples in the scriptures that we can learn from. We can be like Nephi and be willing to go and do or like his brothers and murmur and complain. After reading our scriptures, Brayden and I ask “what can I learn? How can I apply it?” We read about the 24 Lamanite daughters that were abducted. The Lamanite king and his people were angry and started a battle with the Nephites and a lot of people died. If the king had investigated and sought out the truth, there might not have been a war. We learned it’s important to search out details and not react with hasty decisions.

We have scripture journals where we read and sketch out scripture stories. It’s great because it helps the scriptures “come to life”. Brenlee, my two year old, likes to get her little scriptures and sit with us on the couch. One day, we were preparing to read and she wanted a turn. She opened her scriptures and said, “Heavenly Father love me!” She’s right. Heavenly Father does love us and he gave us scriptures to learn more about him and how to become better people.

I’m not perfect in reading my scriptures. My family isn’t perfect in reading our scriptures. We don’t read every day but we keep trying. I know the scriptures can bring us closer to Heavenly Father. The scriptures are like food for our spirits. Remember, scripture reading is equally important as praying.  Joseph Smith’s First Vision started with scriptures. A scripture stood out to him and then he applied that scripture and prayed for an answer.

I’m thankful for scriptures. I’m thankful for the people that lived years ago and their interactions with God that influence me today. I’ve shared before but when my boys lost their hearing, I was concerned about teaching them the gospel. My favorite scripture and the first one I memorize was 1Nephi 3:7. The Lord did and will provide a way for us to accomplish the things he wants us to. This branch and the ASL scripture stories are that way provided to my family and I’m thankful.  In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen

Fasting and Goals

Fasting has always been a little hard for me. I have to prepare for it (drink a lot of water beforehand) or I really struggle. I think a lot of it is attitude as well. I was talking to the two oldest about how we'd like them to start participating in fasting. Brielle said, "that's hard!" She's right, it is hard but we can and should do hard things. I've sort of had a block, like her, and said it's hard.

Today I had a different experience with fasting. Today I focused on redirecting that temporal discomfort. When I felt uncomfortable or hungry, I thought about fasting and I thought about the Lord. My fast had a purpose and I thought about it over and over again as I felt some of the physical effects of fasting.

Prayer is important. Fasting is a more sincere way (I'm willing to sacrifice) to pray. It is ironic that while you feel more physical weak, you feel more spiritually strong. I think that's the point of fasting. You put off the temporal and focus on the spiritual.

I felt more away of our spiritual needs. Our body signals to let us know when we're hungry and thirsty. What about our spirit? We need spiritual nourishment too.

Today I shared my testimony and signed it. I was thrilled to have an interpreter compliment my signing. It has improved. I'm still not where I want to be but I've improved. I thought about goals and how one of the main reasons, our purpose for coming to this earth, is to improve. We're here to become like our Savior. Those are big shoes to fill but it's important not to give up. We make goals but we don't always keep them. We have to constantly recommit and try again.

I was thinking about Bryce and his example. He lost the ability to walk. He completely lost the ability and could take no more than a step and collapse. It was painful to see. His decline was extreme and has and is taking time to recover. The thing I love about Bryce is he's a fighter. He doesn't know CAN'T. He went from a walker to a step and falling. Then two steps and falling. Then a few steps. Now, he's starting to run. He's still highly unstable but he's so much better and stronger. What if he quit? He never would have progressed to where he is today.

We need to be the same way. So, we didn't read our scriptures today. We don't need a new year to start over. We have a new day--every day. We start fresh. We can begin again. We can plead with the Lord to help us overcome some of our hardest challenges. We can apply his atonement to help us become like him. It's a process. It's a life long process. Whatever our goals, I hope we'll continue to press forward. I hope we'll embrace hard things and let them do what they're meant to do and grow us. I hope we'll set the same goal we did three years ago that we haven't quit mastered but maybe take a different approach. Maybe this time, with the Lord's help, we can get it or make small improvements.